im soo psst

all i doo is crawl for jeremy and treat him like gold..all i get is ignored and put aside..wtf did i do to deserve all of this. he puts me aside for fucking bitch ass motherfucking leah..ive had it with her bull shit they tell me not to hate her but give me one good reason why shouldnt...so he can be friendly wih her.....jason is actin werid too his borhter he hardly says hi.its ridiculous if there is a scam behind all this then i want to know.;....so far ..omg ive so fuckin had it if he dosent call me back im gona haunt is swetest dreams

nobody posts anymore

in am inrevcably inescapably totally sickenly inlove with jeremy lee white. we are back together..but we are keep our relationship private..at least out of the noses of leah and pauls. i dont even go over there or hardly answer there phone calls anymore..if they call me i know its only because they need or want something..here it is plain and simple paul cant take a hint..and leave an issue alone and leah oh god..leah is a two faced backstabbing drama queen who lies, cheats, constanly is trying to flirt and touch my boyfriend jeremy..she keeps grabing his dick...jeremys like well shes just playing..playing my ass..shes tyrying to pisss me off and congradulations it works you stuped bitch...but see what she dosent realize is that i am more intellegent, beautiful, caring, kind, than she will ever be and i stress the intellgence two....if it was legal id kill this girl...i will eventually find a way to get her out of jeremys and mines life...well i actually already have a way...but its very risky and im still thinkin bout it.may not have to tho...her boyfriend hasnt been paying his rent for months or insurance which he dosent have...he lies to leah lol...if she only knew the shit he tells me and dosent tell her lmao...god..im so ahead of the game...but anyways they are being evicted HELL YEAH. i think this is gods way of keeping me from completely ruining my life and commiting the ultimate sin...god does look out for me and im happy for it..luv you god,..i always play dumb for them...if they realize that im secretly in my mind making fun of them because im way smarter than both of them...oh god.....paul thinks hes so smart..but all of his debating is a bunch of bullshit..hes trys to come off smart but hes actually talking bullshit lmao...i just go with it..can you say cooocooo..and leah somenbody needs to kill that bitch she shouldnt even exsist..can u say fucked up, i have no idea how anybody could stand to go out with her and paul...i dont get how he does it..ive come top the conclusion that he is so desperate not to be alone that he pulled leah off the streets of women(the easiest) and said come live with me..haha..do they not realize i know them completely..know cuz they think im this cluty absent minded blond....give that off to aviod confrontation. I HATE DRAMA..EXP LEAHS RIDICULOUS BITCH ASS DRAMA does she need to have everything made a big deal to be happy..god....somebody shoot her..well anyways im gonna go do something luv everybody who took the time to read my complaining...

im playin for keeps

okay so ive been lackin to update this..me and jeremy broke up but got back together..he took me to meet the family..hes family luvs me..his brother took me 4-wheelin and then we went swimmin in the creek..and fished a little bit..jeremy just watched and didnt envole himself....he keeps callin me a red neck....errrrrr...i really think i love him...ive realized i love matt but not in the way i thought..its craxy this love triangle sht...the one thing that scares me tho bout my and jeremys relationship is leah and paul...no just leah..it is vey obvious leah has a attrction towards jeremy and i fear it is self returned to her by jeremy. and leah is a drama queen..i just one smack her in the face and tell her to be real..jeremys best friend paul which is a good friend of mine and leahs boyfriend feels the same way..he was telling me how she drives him nuts with her bullshit...they do not do well together..i fear pauls gonna lose it with her..everytime she has issues with e or paul she runs to jeremy my bf and pauls best friend....ive haD IT WITH LEAH..i love jeremy and i wish leah could be removed from the picture..but how...ill come up with something....omg i love jeremy...me and megan sat down and talked the other day bout our issues with each other and then she said i was really the only person she had ......i felt honored but at the same time i felt like someone just droped a million bolders on my sholders..i love megan with all my heart and ill always be there for her......i wanna get away for a while to clear my head....its racing and churning and screaming.....i need a break from people and the drama..im used to being alone and now i have a large circle of friends and they are all conected and it creates drama...i never have time to myself anymore....i actually miss it...thats bad...i wish it was just me and jeremy...not leah and paul....tooooo...well i gotta get off here and do laundry/...tata

i cant fix u and u dont want me

ok so right now me and my boyfriend..i think..r fighting cuz he thinks i had sex with one of my good friends matt tompson..come on now...plus i think im in love with dem both now...one wants me half way and the other fully..or did i think..ive just had it...my girl megan went to the hospital the other day..i was worried shitless bout her....ugh..everythings fine do....i think...um lately ive felt like my friends r trying to make me pick and choose my friends and im just sooo stressed and i dont know what yto do bout it but try like always to make EVERYONE happy......i want to stay wit jeremey but my gosh hes so fucking complicated...damn..and i thouyght i was a drama queen haha....neways..ttyall later

when im with him i am thinking of you

ok so heres the update..ive been back in contact with matt and for some reason completely fell..i didnt tell him that tho..i just told him i hadnt been attracted to a guy in over a year untill i started to talk to him...he was atually supposed to come up today but he never showed...im really hurt over that..i started crying..crying for god sakes....andi cant call him for some reason his phone wont work..and he hasnt called me or bothered to call and say hey..im not showing..fuck that man..i met some new awesome friends..leah,paul and jeremy...jeremy likes me tho but nothing really clicks..but once matt told me he wasnt into me i said what the hell..lets give this guy a try..but when im with him all im thinking of is matt. wtf its so wrong but i cant stop...i dont understand i dont...and the fucked up thing is that in highschool matt was like inlove with me and now that i am into him its like..wtf ever..yeah im always second best...as many times as ive been thru this shit ud think itd hurt less..it hurts more and more.....i wish hed call me..if he really caqres like he says he wouldnt leave me hangin...but who knows...

halluluia..oh wait..i forgot his number

ok so i went swimin today..i met this really cute guy 24 yers old and likes everything i like...except..i didnt have the guts to ask his number....i was waitin for him..tuped stuped me...he loved the ocean, to travel, and he made me feel speacial...not many people can do that anymore..so im..like fuck it.so ima have to go to kianawha city pool more often and tey to catch this guys number....im back at my apartment for the first time in a week...and a feel a hell of alot beter than when i left.....supposbly one a my friends might be comn back up to live with me but....idk..somethin just doesent seem right to me.....but maybe im being paranoid...who knows....ive been dalin with the he said she said drama again. i hate that shit..but everything got worked out on both sides so its alright......one of my friends moms is callin me askin bout her daughter..well she left a voicemail cuz i wasnt there at the time my phone rang...i was swimming..(hugs water)...so when i heard the voicemail..i was like shit..cuz my friend had asked me to not tell her where shes at but her mother was like please call me back i really need to get ahold of her..i really like her mom and want to tell her whats goin on but o also dont want to upset my friend and ruin our friendship...so im in a kind of perdicument here....thats life for ya tho...so yeah...well im gonna go try and get ahold of this dude i just met..so holla if ya know me..if not get the fuck off my blog

fuck fuck fuck fuck

ok so im sittin here cryin my eyes out hopin to god that its not her on the computer at her house..cuz if so that means shes not pickin up which means her stuped mother fucking boyfriend is tellin her no can speak to me..and if i find out thats the case im gonna go down to belington police station and start some helll. and if its that she rather choose him over me as a friend..well then ive just about had it. i wish everone would just shut the fuck up and listen to me for once..ive been thru it fucking all ...i love megan to death..i fuckin do but this is bullshit..maybe im just overreactin. maybe its him from his computer at work and megans out somewhere...but if thats not the case im gonna give people hell. IVE HAD IT