im playin for keeps

okay so ive been lackin to update this..me and jeremy broke up but got back together..he took me to meet the family..hes family luvs me..his brother took me 4-wheelin and then we went swimmin in the creek..and fished a little bit..jeremy just watched and didnt envole himself....he keeps callin me a red neck....errrrrr...i really think i love him...ive realized i love matt but not in the way i thought..its craxy this love triangle sht...the one thing that scares me tho bout my and jeremys relationship is leah and paul...no just leah..it is vey obvious leah has a attrction towards jeremy and i fear it is self returned to her by jeremy. and leah is a drama queen..i just one smack her in the face and tell her to be real..jeremys best friend paul which is a good friend of mine and leahs boyfriend feels the same way..he was telling me how she drives him nuts with her bullshit...they do not do well together..i fear pauls gonna lose it with her..everytime she has issues with e or paul she runs to jeremy my bf and pauls best friend....ive haD IT WITH LEAH..i love jeremy and i wish leah could be removed from the picture..but how...ill come up with something....omg i love jeremy...me and megan sat down and talked the other day bout our issues with each other and then she said i was really the only person she had ......i felt honored but at the same time i felt like someone just droped a million bolders on my sholders..i love megan with all my heart and ill always be there for her......i wanna get away for a while to clear my head....its racing and churning and screaming.....i need a break from people and the drama..im used to being alone and now i have a large circle of friends and they are all conected and it creates drama...i never have time to myself anymore....i actually miss it...thats bad...i wish it was just me and jeremy...not leah and paul....tooooo...well i gotta get off here and do laundry/...tata

i cant fix u and u dont want me

ok so right now me and my boyfriend..i think..r fighting cuz he thinks i had sex with one of my good friends matt tompson..come on now...plus i think im in love with dem both now...one wants me half way and the other fully..or did i think..ive just had it...my girl megan went to the hospital the other day..i was worried shitless bout her....ugh..everythings fine do....i think...um lately ive felt like my friends r trying to make me pick and choose my friends and im just sooo stressed and i dont know what yto do bout it but try like always to make EVERYONE happy......i want to stay wit jeremey but my gosh hes so fucking complicated...damn..and i thouyght i was a drama queen haha....neways..ttyall later